Backwoods: Sugar Without Shame

Over the weekend I tried a "Backwoods" brand cigar from the visiting Canadian, just out of curiousity. These skinny, shaggy sticks smelled mighty good when he was smoking them - vanilla or some such scent - and they looked manly in a raggedy, cowboyish kind of way. Probably designed that way by some clever marketing team, so that manly cigar-chompers could indulge their feminine side without being obvious.

They came in a soft, foil-lined package, like chewing tobacco. I opened the bag, took a whiff, and was captivated. After a day or two of offhand references (What was the name of those cigars you were smoking? How much do those things cost? Boy, those things sure smelled good...) the Canadian finally caught my drift and offered me one.

"Sweet Aromatic" I believe was the flavor designation. It lit it up, feeling like I should be wearing cowboy boots and a gunbelt instead of sandals and shorts. The cigar tasted like vanilla to me; and not half bad. And, unlike the dreaded Swisher Sweets, there was no sugar coating on the end of it. No cheating required because the tobacco itself seemed to be drenched in flavoring. I wondered how they did it: Soak the things in vanilla extract?

At first, I was enchanted. Vanilla smoke! Exciting! But it felt progressively syrupy as the cigar wore on. Kind of like getting cotton candy when what you really want is ice cream. More significantly, the burn on this thing was not reliable - when I left it unattended for more than 20 seconds, it would start to peter out and I'd have to revive it with frantic smokestack puffing.

After about ten minutes, my palate was sated. How much sweetness can a man stand? I set the half-smoked cigar aside for a breather, and the next time I picked it up, it had gone out.

I didn't bother to relight it. I'd gotten the picture.

I don't know if there's a better 15-minute smoke out there, or a better "flavored" cigar, but compared to Swisher Sweets, Backwoods is a no-brainer. And on those special occasions when you feel like pouring confectioner's sugar on your tongue and washing it down with a root beer float, I couldn't think of a better cigar to follow it with.